A long overdue update:

50 pounds down now, hoping to reach 65 by the end of the year, this should be doable since we wont be visiting family for the holidays so holiday food temptation should be very limited lol.

We are planning to change our insurance effective the first of the year and I am currently waging whether or not to start fertility treatments again after our new insurance takes effect. Though I know it would be best to wait for my weight loss journey to be over before starting our family it is really hard to keep my desire to start a family at bay. After over a year of no success im just not sure if I have the patience to keep pushing forward with weight loss, and with our new insurance my access to non-judgemental care regarding my weight should increase greatly. 

Also on the radar we are planning on putting our condo up for sale in early spring of next year, so needless to say I have been scrambling around trying to figure out exactly what needs to be done/repaired before listing. Though its several months away if we are going to replace our flooring or do any other large projects we will have to plan and coordinate them now to be able to list in spring.

So thats pretty much it I guess, just figured I would fill everyone in. 

💗 you guys!  🍀 & 👶✨!

Just to update, as I have not been on in a while… My doctors appointment went well, I am now on the mini-pill to regulate my cycle until I have lost enough weight to conceive on my own or qualify for in depth infertility treatments under our current provider. Weight loss has been going very well, I have definitely found a “zen” in my diet and exercise routine. So far I have lost just under 30 pounds since I started back in April. I hope everyone is doing well :)

💗 you guys!  🍀 & 👶✨!

I have been thinking about going back on birth control until I lose enough weight for doctors to treat my infertility further than just Clomid. My PCOS symptoms are not managed well enough without birth control and I currently do not have a cycle at all. Unmanaged PCOS just makes weight loss so much harder and I think that if I start taking birth control again it will help me to lose the weight quicker…I have a doctors appointment on Friday so I will see how that goes I guess. 

growingourlittlefamily:

$150 of groceries later, our fridge finally looks like people live here again, and that we eat more than condiments!

Lol we truck down to Wegmans every Friday to do the same :)

It’s pretty clear that Clomid 100mg did not work for me this cycle. I am very reluctant to try again at a higher dose next month because of the terrible side effects. My current game plan is to continue to lose weight in hopes that my cycle will return on its own. In the last two months I have lost 17 pounds and have become an avid user of MyFitnessPal, so I think that I am moving in the right direction. It was a hard decision to make but I think that putting off TTC for a while is what is best for my body and for my relationship. The stress was way too much and my body was not responding well to the various medications I was taking to jump start my cycle and induce ovulation.

I need to refocus my energy on becoming more healthy, realign my expectations for my journey to parenthood, and spend less time comparing my life to the lives of those around me.

I plan to stick around on Tumblr to follow all of your TTC journeys but for now mine has been put on hold.

Side Note: If you would like to add me on MyFitnessPal my screen name is AshleyAuvil.

💗 you guys!  🍀 & 👶✨!

I keep seeing the “If your happy and you know it” Target commercial and feel like such an infertile myrtle. FML.

CD18

CD18 and I still have not ovulated, starting to get the feeling that I may be Clomid resistant. Hopefully ovulation will happen in the next few days but I highly doubt it at this point. Moving on to Clomid 150mg I guess… Not sure how I will handle it if I go through this again next cycle… Bring on the Provera.

The only thing I will ever say about circumcision…

The genital mutilation aspect put aside, why would you take the RISK to lose your long awaited child due to an elective surgery. Is it really worth that risk? Are you willing to deal with the possible consequences?

These are the questions you have to honestly ask yourself. For my family, there is NO way that I could ever take that risk. 

I have spent the last three days helping my father sort through 20 years worth of documents and files before he moves out of our place. Who in their right mind saves a Zaxby’s receipt from 2004? Somebody save me!

A few of my YouTube favorites:

Lately I have been watching a lot of YouTube mommy vloggers who who have shared their TTC journeys through video blogging and I thought would share their channels with you guys as they give me a lot of hope in this process. Below are links to a few of my favorites.

WannaBMommy2B: After struggling to TTC she recently gave birth to two beautiful twin boys. She documented her TTC journey, pregnancy, and now motherhood. 

DanielleBabyBliss: A natural mama who has shared her TTC journey, pregnancy and motherhood. Lots of interesting videos about breastfeeding, cloth diapering, and health & fitness. 

TheBubbleLush: A very down to earth mother of 2. She documented both of her pregnancies and TTC, she always gives me a good laugh.

BumpsAlongTheWay: After both a miscarriage, and stillbirth, she is pregnant for a third time within a year. They are expecting a baby boy in August. 

MandD627: Struggled to conceive baby #1 due to PCOS, now she is pregnant with baby #2. Very down to earth and honest about her TTC journey and motherhood. 

Anyways, those are just a few of my favorites. I know sometimes it’s hard to see the big picture when trying to conceive, their blogs have helped me to remember to be patient and that my time will come whether it be through great medical intervention, naturally, or other means. Try to stay positive!

CD12

I am getting a little more optimistic that i might actually ovulate this cycle. My OPKs which usually give me a very very faint second line regardless of CD look to be actually progressing to some extent. My temps however have been all over the place, so I guess I will have to wait until the end of this cycle to really get the big picture chart wise. At this point I am thinking that i will probably ovulate somewhere between CD15-19 given my OPKs and I just have a feeling that I will be late to ovulate. I really hope that this works, if not we will be moving on to Femara I guess.